Every few months I decide that someone out there in the world must care about what’s on my mind. Then I sit and stare at a blank box trying to figure out some way to make myself sound interesting. I don’t think I ever achieve this goal unless I’ve had a lot of coffee. Even then, what’s actually on my mind and what I feel comfortable posting for the world to see are two different things.
What I do feel comfortable sharing with you are the following things:
The last week has been hell. I’ve been stuck constantly juggling substances that are terrible for me. Before you get excited, I mean caffeine, nicotine and anti-inflamitories. I know, I live a wild life. My brain has been splitting open for a solid week now and there is no relief in sight. I forget how it even feels to have a normal day.
Why is it so hard to just drink water? While researching a few ways to decrease the chance of getting a migraine I read that the brain is 97% water! So what happens when we get dehydrated? The brain can’t function. That is certainly how I feel – dysdunctional.
On top of this, the boyfriend has made a pretty hardcore decisions to quit smoking after 15 years. Honestly, I love smoking. Sure, it makes your teeth yellow, makes you stink, rots your lungs and is just gross in general…but I enjoy it. I have unlimited options: patches, vapors, replacing cigarettes with candy (the only option that I like), but I don’t like any of them enough yet.
So I’m looking at replacing coffee with water and cigarettes with fresh air and I’m not happy about it one bit. I don’t even know where to get started. I did buy an expensive water bottle that filters water on the spot so I can fill up anywhere and have instantly clean water to drink! Yay. I also bought a bag of Jolly Ranchers to shut my oral fixation cravings up. So far, it’s not working.